A little masti a little gulal

Holi is the mark and a way to say good bye to the cold and chilly winter and welcoming the spring with a rainbow of colors. It is a festival of colors when all the children and adults gather on the streets and apply gulal of different colors on each other. Holi is the festival when a flood of memories transport me back to my hometown and my childhood. We children used to throw buckets of colored water and water balloons on the passers by from our terrace. The night before huge bonfires were lit, effigies of the demon Holika was burned to symbolize the triumph of good over evil. It is also the celebration of the grains having matured and they are offered to please the Gods. It is the only day when we wear our old clothes and don’t mind getting color stained. There is an atmosphere of merriment all over. It’s a day to throw away worries and enjoy. Every nook and corner presents a colorful sight.

We kids formed tolis or gangs as we sang, danced and threw colors on each other. Similar gangs could be seen every where. There was not a single lane street or compound that did not resound with the shouts of Holi Hai Holi is one of my favorite festivals. While playing Holi I was always most concerned about my hair   as I have long hair. My mother always applied coconut based hair oil as it acts as a protective layer for my hair against the colors and summer heat. We played so much with colors that it was always exhausting. But eating delicious gujiyas and samosas rejuvenated me. In the childhood Holi meant sheer fun. Our Holi day started with sprinkling gulal on the idol of Lord Krishna. Home made Gujiyas were offered as bhog. My mother used to make gulal at home by grinding dried flowers due to which the whole house smelt of flowers and
chandan. Red colour was made with rose flowers, yellow color with haldi and white
color with chameli flowers. Then we helped to make Kanji, a cool drink made with vada. A special thali filled with color was kept in the verandah. Then starting from the eldest as a sign of respect, everyone would put some color on each other. Home made Gujiya, samosas, snacks and kanji were served to everyone. On Holi day, there are no constraints. You can put as much color on anyone and drench anyone repeatedly. Nowadays the celebrations on Holi are different. Due to chemical reactions, skin allergies people stay away from colors. The times are different now. On the day of Holi people should feast together, it is a festival for all regardless of differences in age, sex, status and caste. We kids used to smear and throw colors almost everywhere and on everyone including buildings, animals and the people. For me Holi is set out with colors, water-guns, balloons, mithais, thandai and lots of excitement, and is the most awaited festival of India. Majority of the kids, like me eagerly waited for its arrival. We had a rip roaring fantastic time. I may not be a kid any more but I have decided to play #KhulKeKheloHoli

So what are you going to do this Holi?



“I’m pledging to #KhulKeKheloHoli this year by sharing my Holi memories at BlogAdda in association with Parachute Advansed.”

Come play Holi

Each one of us has memorable childhood memories of playing Holi. As a child, I would wake up at 5 o'clock in the morning and start filling all the balloons with water and keep them in a bucket.
Everybody from our society used to gather on the terrace by around 9 or10 o'clock. We all used to throw balloons on people's head and shout Happy Holi. We would play loud music on the roof and get drenched in water.We used to have sweets and play holi with friends and relatives and sometimes with strangers who became friends afterwards. We would throw balloons on people from the balcony. It was a lot of fun. For us in the building it was always 'Girls vs. Boys' which would be a lot of fun. Entire streets and neighborhoods were drenched in color. Everyone was so immersed in red, purple, green and yellow colors that one could not distinguish one from the other. 
There was joy, playfulness, a reaching out to friends and strangers. We spent hours filling buckets of water preparing to have water-balloon-fights with our friends. The night before Holi friends came over to help us fill lots of water balloons in preparation for the balloon fights with friends and neighbors. By the end of the day everyone was multicolored. Holi was an all time favorite festival for me always. Initially I used to declare that I will not play with colors and would stay at home then I used to slyly sit with a bucket on my terrace and throw water on my friends. They used to keep guessing from where the water is coming. Honestly, I used to love that. All I can say is those days were totally fun. I used to sing my favorite holi song Holi Ke Din from the film Sholay and color one and all. 
It was funny to see people behaving strange when they consumed bhang. Market places were flooded with new style pichkaris and we as kids used to ask our parents to get the latest design Pichkaris for us and to drench everybody in the town. My mother also started her preparations early for the holi festival as she made loads of gujiyas, papri, and dahi vadas for the family, guests and relatives. There was great excitement among one and all. Bright colors of gulal filled the air and people took turns in pouring color water over each other. We took special delight in spraying colors on one another with our pichkaris and throwing water balloons on the passers by. Women and senior citizens formed groups or tolis and moved in colonies applying colors and exchanging greetings. Songs, dance on the rhythm of dholak and mouthwatering
Holi delicacies were the best part of the celebrations and I wish that Holi would come more often.




“I’m pledging to #KhulKeKheloHoli this year by sharing my Holi memories at BlogAdda in association with Parachute Advansed.”

An open letter to my Love

Dear Love,
                   You are Tall, Dark and Handsome .If your being TDH was not enough you even have a bike and ride it like John Abraham this is another way of yours to sweep us girls off our feet. You make my heart miss a beat every time you look in the rear mirror of your bike flex your biceps and triceps as you pull out your comb from your rear pocket and comb your hair. Your confidence speaks volumes about your personality that you do not even care that your dandruff may be falling on your shoulders or going into the eyes of those sitting behind you on your bike. Is this your idea of showering your love on your beloved?
You surely do believe in “Saath Jiyenge aur Saath Marenge” meaning we will live together and die together other wise why do you keep smoking when ever you are with me and kill me slowly by way of passive smoking. Have you not seen the Sunny Leone advt. which says that each cigarette reduces up to 11 minutes of your life and yet you say you want to live with me? If smoking kills you then how do you plan to spend the rest of your life with me?
On one hand you want to hold my hand and walk the path of your life with me where as when you have had a few drinks them you can hardly stand let alone walk with me. Thereupon you insist on driving despite knowing that drinking and driving do not go together.
You are the dude who keeps combing and setting his hair after every 15 minutes yet you do not seem to bother to care for what is beneath your hair for you never wear a helmet.
So dear love even my fasting for you on Karva Chauth every year cannot save you from your sad end.
So if you love me then stay alive long enough to be with me and take a kasam that
you would Quit Smoking so both of us may live healthy together.
Don't drink and drive because I would be waiting for you everyday to come back home safe and sound.
Be safe on the roads and also do not be a traffic hazard to others.
So if you are ready to live with me and take all these Kasam's and follow them then take one more final Kasam.
You would get yourself a good anti dandruff shampoo and use it always so that let your love be the only thing that blinds me sitting next to you and it’s not your dandruff!

 “I’m blogging about the kasams I want from my man this Women’s Day with the #SadaSexy activity at BlogAdda in association with Set Wet.”

For my sada sexy partner

We both know that wedding vows, personalities, responsibilities and many other things will differ from marriage to marriage. Husbands and wives should be able to expect certain things from one another. Always speak the truth and don't keep secrets from me. Real promises are needed for a healthy partnership, which are different for each couple.

You are my eternal #SadaSexy love and partner and I cannot think of a life without you.
I want your promise to love me more than you love any one else.
I want your promise to respect your boundaries, and you can expect the same in return. We'll both be healthier and happier because of it.
I want your promise to never intentionally hurt me, and expect the same from me.
I want your promise to listen with an open mind and an open heart.
I want your promise to forgive me for my flaws as you expect me to forgive your flaws.
I want your promise to honor my dreams and fears and to understand me for who I am.
I want your promise to make time for me and spend quality time together.

Loving what I know of you, trusting what things I will discover. I will respect you as a person, a partner, and an equal. My #SadaSexy I was yours and I am devoted to you in every way. I will be a joy to your heart and food for your soul. To learn with you and grow with you, even as time and life change us both. I promise to laugh with you in the good times and struggle alongside you in the bad times. I promise to respect you and cherish you as an individual, a partner, and an equal. I will support you, push you, inspire you, and above all love you. I will be your partner in all of life’s #SadaSexy adventures. Loving what I know of you and trusting what I don’t yet know. As your companion, I will seek to be open and honest with you. I vow to spend my life cultivating my love and care for you, for our family, and for all living things. Our #SadaSexy relationship is my most important consideration; it gives me strength, and I vow to put every effort into strengthening it in turn through honesty, faithfulness, and patience. For all the days that we live with one another, I promise to spend each day working to become a #SadaSexy truer version of myself, and I will do my utmost to help you do the same. You are my greatest supporter and my biggest fan. I am so lucky. You are my best #SadaSexy life time friend. 

 “I’m blogging about the kasams I want from my man this Women’s Day with the #SadaSexy activity at BlogAdda in association with Set Wet.”

Sharing is easy

Women are not only fighting for equality or equal entitlement to the opportunities in the
pursuit of   their career but also to get their husbands to share the work at home when they are available. Laundry isn't just a woman's job and this prejudice related to household chores is constantly being passed on to the next generation. Gone are the days when it was considered that all the household work from cooking to washing of the family laundry is a women’s job. Today women are managing home and office efficiently. The women of the house are seen doing all the house work while the males are seen watching the TV. This is what the children have learned from their elders. Now both men and women are bread earners then why they both do not share the work burden together. Children learn from what they see so we must set a example for them. Now it’s time to think of a long term solution to this problem by nipping the prejudice at the bud. Children learn what they see and what they are taught by their parents. So if they see that the household chores are the exclusive domain of women, they will carry this prejudice well into their adulthood. Boys aren’t taught how to take care of children and how to do laundry. Washing clothes is not a rocket science. It’s very simple and just needs the will to help and understand that its good to share responsibility and break this old practice of putting all the laundry work on the ladies of the house. The issue is not ofcompetence. If someone wants to learn how to cook, take care of children and manage the household chores she or he can certainly do so. The competence in household skills is not the exclusive domain of women.2 out of every 3 children think that washing clothes is a mother’s job but the fact is it is not. It’s a mother’s love and not her job or responsibility.78% of girls in India agree that they should learn to do laundry as they will have to do it when they grow up. The question is why?

Almost all the household have a washing machine and one just need to put the clothes and washing powder and set the machine to do the washing then why only girls are made to do all the laundry. Why this discrimination.81% of married men in India agree
that their daughters must learn household chores. The point is that the boys should be trained for the same. Now there are no extended families any more so husband and wife should be equally trained for the household work to support each other and balance their lives.

I join Ariel and BlogAdda to fight the imbalance within the household by
asking #IsLaundryOnlyAWomansJob and asking men to #ShareTheLoad.

“I am joining the Ariel #ShareTheLoad campaign at BlogAdda and blogging about the prejudice related to household chores being passed on to the next generation.”

Alittle help is what is needed

Today women are highly educated but the mindset of the society is still old and full of disparity. The twin role of a home maker and career is quite challenging. There is a generational change from my mother’s time to my grand daughters time. The outlooks, aspirations, mode of dressing and eating styles have changed a lot but the ills of society for women are still there. The rule set by society that household chore, especially laundry, is a woman’s job is still prevalent. Masculinity and manhood are constructed through a gradual, timely, an orderly process, of socially prescribed, family centered and community related roles and responsibilities. The extent of these male focused roles is, to a large extent, undertaken by women at the household level, where primary socialization takes place. Boys are taught by their mothers and shown by their fathers how to be a man and they are excused. Today women are more self confident and sure of what they want and deserve. They expect their husbands to be equal partners in parenting and in sharing the chores of the household. There are million of women who despite doing a larger share of domestic labor don’t complain of this inequality of performing ‘female’ tasks around the house. My sister is a full time employed mother who often complains about the burden on her. 

The morning time is the hardest, when she gets her six year old son ready for the day. She wishes if she could gets a helping hand from her husband. She wished her husband would help her by taking the kid to the bus stop or help him pack his bag for school but he always shows his superiority of being a male and refuses to help my sister in any way. My sister’s biggest and oldest complaint is when both are at home. Her husband won’t help with the laundry. She often asks him as to why doesn’t he help with the laundry to which he says "Never do it. I've never done it on my own and probably never will.” He doesn’t help because he feels entitled not to. 

He needs to relax when he comes home from work and on holidays and Sundays. While my sister wont sit still even on a Sunday. That’s the difference between her and her husband. She is cooking, feeding the kid or doing laundry whereas her husband is watching television or having an outing with friends. She and more women like her need help. If only their husband do some laundry or make dinner occasionally. Women today want more help and also want appreciation for the work they do at home and for what they have given up, the sacrifice of their time and for their efforts.

 She doesn’t demand equality but wants recognition for the costs that inequality has imposed on her. She has less leisure time till her children have gone to bed and after doing all the household chores. Most households are of the collective opinion that doing any household chore, especially laundry, is a woman’s job. Its time to balance this disparity within the household by asking #IsLaundryOnlyAWomansJob and asking men to #ShareTheLoad. And now it’s time to think of a long term solution to this problem by nipping the prejudice at the bud.

“I am joining the Ariel #ShareTheLoad campaign at BlogAdda and blogging about the prejudice related to household chores being passed on to the next generation.”

oops I just broke that Stereotype

I am a free spirited person who hates being typecast into categories or stereotypes . Talking about stereotypes I must share the following details with you
Did you know that….

a. 69% of men agree that their judgement of women is based on their

looks.

b. 64% of women agree that the judgments passed on them have

affected their ability to reach their true potential.

c. 70%of women agree that majority of judgments on women are from

family members or friends rather than strangers.

d. 72% of women agree that working women face more judgments on

their looks or their clothes than housewives.
Yes these statistics are true and not a figment of my imagination. There figures are taken from the Nihar Naturals #IAmCapable survey conducted by Nielsen India . The above statistics shows how we sterotype others and ourselves.We all use stereotypes, all the time, without knowing it.Each of us has a biased view.We all have limited perspective.Life is a constant struggle.When I look back I find myself thinking what the others will think and accordingly should  I get dressed or act.However I love to dress differently or try new styles and fashion but I always selected clothes or accessories according to the occasion because I know I would not be accepted because of societies set rules.However slowly I tried to break free trying out different outfits and mixing and matching clothes. Since I was breaking a Stereotype that girl should dress in a certain way so there was opposition but I followed my heart and after some time evolved my own style of dressing that I still go by.After spending time observing the attributes of career in the eyes of a man I realized a harsh reality that women are treated differently than men in corporate world. Many women experience unfair judgment and treatment based on stereotypes.Many women lack career advancement partly due to longstanding negative stereotypes that follow women. Women face the challenge of being viewed as having deficiencies in maturity and the ability to take charge of their careers. It is often believed that the women wearing saree would lack the leadership skills that would enable them to run a department or organization. We pay more attention to stereotypes than we think.I am an individual and I am going to break these stereotypes at every opportunity and every stage of my life.The best way is to show my confidence and improve my body language. Show the world that they have to change their mindsets and accept us "women" in all fields of life.Its time to show and prove to the world that we women are capable of all sorts of jobs and we should not be discriminated on the basis of our appearance and clothing. Women are categorized into "Traditional" or "modern".If girls have long hair they are homely feminine and if short they are tomboys. People have fixed mindsets and think girls with long hair are fit to look after home only and they  should not take any profession. I have long hair and I used to wear salwar kameez yet I am a rebel with a cause. I still remember when I passed my 12th all my relatives suggested to me that I should take up home science and they started looking for a suitable
groom for me! When I told them that I want to go for management studies they all discouraged me. When I started learning driving I saw people staring at me in a strange manner as if they have seen an alien driving on the road. I encountered such stereotype in the professional world as well. I must admit that at times it can be tough but like a lone warrior I march on challenging stereotypes and breaking them. I
would like to give a big thanks to Nihar a brand which believes in encouraging and enabling women to achieve their full potential. Society should stop appearance based stereotypes as it affects women's morale and professional progress.We all want freedom from judgement that are passed on .An individual should be judged on creativity and productivity.


“I’m breaking stereotypes based on appearance by sharing my experience for the #IAmCapable activity at BlogAdda in association with Nihar Naturals.”